The week in women: royal babies, placenta smoothies, and all things mom

Ah, Mother’s Day. Sure, it’s a manufactured holiday that has evolved into a smorgasbord of commercialism, but there’s no need to be cynical. Mothers are wonderful. Everybody loves mothers. So in honor of the woman who gave you life, enjoy this selection of mom-related news.

A certain someone gave birth to a certain baby named Charlotte Elizabeth Diana, and then waltzed out of the hospital like she just woke up from a restful nap. Of course, one doesn’t have to be a follically-gifted Duchess in order to be a mother worth talking about. We took to the streets to discover the legacies and lessons that New Yorkers have inherited from the women who brought them into this world.

Those who are thinking of becoming mothers might want to pack their bags and head over to Norway, recently named the best country in which to be a mother by the State of the World’s Mothers report. The United States only ranked 33rd in the list, possibly due to the fact that it has the worst maternal mortality rate of all countries in the developed world.

Sofia Vergara is not particularly excited by the prospect of becoming a mother again, at least not when motherhood involves the frozen embryos she created with her ex-fiancé during happier times. The Modern Family actress is currently embroiled in a legal battle with her ex Nick Loeb, who is trying to implant the former couple’s embryos without Vergara’s consent. A child, Vergara told Howard Stern, “needs a loving relationship of parents that get along, that don’t hate each other.” Fair enough.

Bad news for expectant moms in England: you can no longer sell your placentas to your local smoothie shop. A U.K. cafe offering smoothies made out of raw human placenta has been shut down by the health department.

Good news for expectant moms in America: thanks to TLC’s new game show “Labor Games,” you can now win $10,000 for your child’s college fund—provided that you are willing to let a television crew into your delivery room and partake in some light self-degradation.

That’s all for now. Go call your mother.

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